Jokes

Beemar private employee se uski biwi ne kaha. Is baar janwaron ke doctor ko dikhao tabhi aap theek hoge.

Employee : Woh kyon?

Biwi:
1. Aap roz subah murge ki tarah jaldi utth jaate ho.
2. Ghode ki tarah bhaag kar office jaate ho.
3. Gadhe ki tarah din bhar kaam karte ho.
4. Bandar ki tarah seniors ke ishaare par naachte ho.
5. Ghar aakar parivaar par kutte ki tarah chillate ho.
6. Aur phir bhains ki tarah khaana kha kar so jaate ho.

Insaan ka doctor tumhein kya khaak theek kar paayega.

Dedicated to all Private Employees

Thekedar se setting ho jaane ke baad clerk ne sahab ko bata kar file rakhi.
Sahab ne likha "Approved"
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Do din baad thekedar vaade se mukar gaya.
Clerk ne sahab ko bataya.
Sahab bole ab kya karein?
Clerk ke dimaag ka kamaal dekhiye
Clerk ne kaha - Sir "Approved" ke pehle "Not" likh deejiye.
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Ab thekedar pareshan. phir se setting huyi.
Clerk phir se sahab ke saamne file lekar pahuncha.
Sahab jhallaye.. Ab kya karein?
Phir clerk ke dimaad ka kamaal dekhiye
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Clerk ne kaha sir "Not" mein kewal "e" laga dein means "Note Approved"

Ab aap hi bataiye ki desh kaun chala raha hai.

Gandhi ji ne kabhi nahi socha hoga ki insaan private job bhi karega.
Warna woh ek aur bandar banaate jo hath se apna pichhwada dhak kar baitha hota.

Ek pati ne ne apni patni se poochha ki "Agar main aapko 2-4 din na dikhoon to aapko kaisa lagega??"

Pati se khushi ke maare raha nahi gaya aur usne bol diya "Bahut achcha lagega"
Bas phir kya
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Patni Monday ko nahi dikhi
Tuesday ko nahi dikhi
Wednesday ko nahi dikhi
Thursday ko bhi nahi dikhi
Friday ko jab aankh ki soojan kam huyi to thoda thoda dikhi.

Bachpan Ke Cricket Rules

1. 8 eenton (bricks) ki wicket hogi.

2. First ball try hogi.

3. Battin team umpiring karegi.

4. Baal deewar ko direct lagi to six aur direct baahar gayi to out.

5. Last batsman akela batting kar sakta hai.

6. Jo beech mein game chhodega usse kal nahi khilayenge.

7. Jo ball baahar phenkega woh khud lekar aayega aur nahi mili to khareedkar layega.

8. Chhote bachche sirf fielding karenge, unhein last mein batting denge.

9. Jab andhera ho jaayega to slow ball karaai jaayegi.

10. Deewar ko lag kar catch hua to not out hoga.

11. 3 ball lagaatar wide to over cancel.

12. Jo jeetega woh agli baar batting karega.

13. Jiska bat hoga wohi opening karega.

Ek dafa ek Badshah ne khushi mein sab kaidi riha kar diye.
Un kaidiyon mein badshah ne ek bahut hi buzurg kaidi ko deka..

Badshah: Tum kabse kaid mein ho?
Buzurg: Aap ke abba ke daur se.
Yeh sun ke Badshah ki aankhon mein aansu aa gaye aur kaha
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Isko dobara kaid mein daal do, yeh abba ki nishani hai.

Wife : Phone pe itni dheemi awaaz mein kis se baat kar rahe ho?
Husband : Behan se.
Wife : To phir itni dhimi awaaz me kis liye?
Husband : Teri hai, Is liye...

Santa Singh : Aaj mere kutte ne anda diya hai.
Banta Singh : Paagal hua hai kya, kutta kabse anda dene laga.
Santa Singh : Yeh mera style hai. Maine apni murgi ka naam "Kutta" rakha hai.