Jokes

Santa's Son: Papa agar aapko Rs. 10 aur Rs. 5 raaste mein pade milein to aap kaun sa note uthaoge

Santa: Rs 10 ka note.

Son: Bas isiliye aap par joke bante hain. Dono bhi to utha sakte ho.

How a man's situation changes:

Before marriage: Hero No. 1
After marriage: Coolie No. 1

Before marriage: I'm in love
After marriage: Why did I fall in love!

Before marriage: Jaan-e-man mat jao
After marriage: Jaan mat khao

Before marriage: Can't live without you
After marriage: Can't live with you

Before marriage: Kuchh to bolo
After marriage: Kabhi chup bhi ho lo

Before marriage: I love you
After marriage: Aaj phir aaloo

And the best one..

Before marriage: Milne kab aaogi
After marriage: Maaike kab jaaogi.

Biwi: Zara kitchen se namak lete aana.
Bechara Pati: Yahan to namak nahi mil raha hai.
Biwi : Hey Bhagwan, mere baap ko tumhare jaisa hi Soordas milna tha.
Mujhe pata tha tum to ho hi andhe
Kaamchor ho...
Nikamme ho....
Gadhe ho....
Ek kaam dhang se nahi kar sakte
Bas bahaane banaate ho
Zindagi mein kuchh to kaam karo...
Tumhein nahi milega, isiliye pehle hi le aayi thi.

Santa finds cigarette box in his daughter's room..
"Oh my god! she smikes"

The he finds whisky
"Oh my god! she drinks"

Then he saw a boy
"Thank God! its all his"

Arrange marriage is...!
"While you are walking, unfortunately a snakes bites you"

But love marriage is...!

Dancing in front of cobra and singing
"Wanna be my chammak challo"

At Niagara Falls

Guide: I welcome you all to Niagara Falls. There are the world's largest waterfalls and the sound intensity of the waterfall is so high, even 20 supersonic planes passing by can't be heard.
Now I request the ladies to keep quite so that we can hear the Niagara Falls.

Real truth about proposal:

Boys always start love with this sentence "We are friends"

AND

Girls always end love with this sentence "We are just friends"

Feel the difference

5 year old boy :- I love u mom
Mom:- Aww! I Love u too......

16 year old boy:- I love u mom
Mom :- Sorry! I have no money..
.
.
25 year old boy:- I love u mom.
Mom:- Hmm... kaun hai woh? kahan rehti hai?
.
.
Moral:- Maa sab jaanti hai
But the best is..
35 yr old man:- Mom I love you
Mom: Beta maine pehle hi bola tha uss kamini se shaadi mat karna

And the last one...
55 yr old man:- Mom I love you...
Mom:- Beta main kisi bhi paper par sign nahi karoongi...