Hindi Jokes

1 Gujarati aur Maarwadi ne samandar ke kinaare Board par likha dekha :

"DOOBTE HUE KO BACHAANE WALE KO Rs. 500 ka INAAM"

Maarwadi :Main samandar mein jump lagata hoon, tum mujhe bacha lena, is tarah Rs. 500 milenge jise hum aadha-aadha baant lenge

Yeh keh kar Maarwadi paani mein kood gaya.

Gujju khamoshi se dekhta raha.

Maarwadi ne chilla ke kaha : Mujhe Tairna nahi aata tum mujhe bachaate kyon nahi?

Gujju : Tum ne board ke neeche nahi padha

Niche likha tha: "LAASH NIKAALNE WALE KO 5000 KA INAAM".

Aisa nahin ki yeh zindagi buri hai...
Par school life ki baat kuch aur thi.

Aisa nhi ki ab hansi nahi aati...
Par doston mein baith ke khilkhilane wali baat kuch aur thi.

Aisa nahi ki ab tension se raat nahi guzarti...
Par exams ki raaton mein jaagne wali baat kuch aur thi.

Aisa nahi k aage aa kar kuch haasil na kiya ho...
Par passing marks le kar party udane wali baat kuch aur thi.

Aisa nahi ki ab zindagi nahi kat rahi hai...
Par doston mein zindagi jeene ki baat hi kuch aur thi.

Maa Kya Hoti Hai?

Ek khoobsurat rishte ka naam hai Maa.

Yeh Maa hi hai jo apne bachchon ko subah uthaati aur kehti hai...
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Uth jao kanjron, 11 baj rahe hain, kutton ki tarah pade rahte ho, tumahre baap ne naukar nahi rakkhe hain jo tumhein nashta bana kar denge

Zindagi haraam kar rakhi hai kameeno ne. Kaam ke na kaaj ke dushman anaaj ke...

Note: Har "Maa" wale msg emotional nahi hote

Maa kabhi kabhi frustrated bhi to ho sakti hai

Judge: Your last wish?
Mujrim: Aap ki beti se shaadi, Nokia N97, 5 crore Rs, USA ka visa, 2 saal ka haneymoon, 6-7 bachche jo aap ko nana nana kahein or mujhe papa aur main un sab ki shaadi karwa doon us ke baad aap jo faisla do mujhe manzoor hoga.
Judge: Hahaha... meri koi beti hi nhi. Tanggo kamine ko.!

Agar ek ladka apna pyar izhar kare to ladki k 5 jawab ye hoge:

1) No
2) Yes
3) Aapko dost samjhti hun
4) I m engaged
5) I love someone else.

Aur ladki izhar kare pyar ko ladke ke 5 jawab ye hoge:

1) Haan.
2) Yes..
3) Ok..
4) Alright
5) Me too..

Moral : Boyz ka dil, dil nahi darya hota hai.

RAILWAY INTERVIEW:-

Interviewer:- agar do gaadiyan ek line pe aa gayi to kya karoge?
Santa:- Jee, red light dikhaunga..
Interviewer:- Red light na ho to?
Santa:- Torch dikhaunga..
Interviewer:- Torch na ho to?
Santa:- Apni red shirt utaar kar dikhaunga.
Interviewer:- Shirt bhi red na huyi to?
Santa:- Fir main apne bua ke ladke ko bulaunga.
Interviewer:- Hain..!! Wo kyun?
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Santa:- Jee, usne kabhi traino ki takkar nahi dekhi.

Secrets of success:
1. Kabhi top na karo warna log tum se jalne lagenge.
2. Hamesha late class mein jao is tarha har teacher tumhe yaad rakhega.
3. Zyada padhne se time zaya hota hai or time zaya karna gunah hai.
4. Kabhi test na do kyun ke beizzati ke 2 marks se izzat ke 0 achche hain.

In 1975 Spiderman, Superman and Batman were flying across india and thay suddenly died.
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Do you know why?
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Yad hai, sholay me GABBAR ne 3 goliya hawa me chalayi thi.