Is It Infection

Ek area mein Bhai rehta hai, Chaman Bhai..
Ab uskey area mein jo bhi koi lafda hota hai to police se pehle Chaman Bhai ki adalat mein jaata hai....
Ek baar Chaman Bhai ke area mein rape ho jata hai, aur jisney game bajayi hoti hai ukso pakad ke Chaman Bhai ke paas leke jatey hain...
Chaman Bhai pehley to bahut shanti se, style mein, us sey baat karta hai... kuch is tarah se...
Chaman : Kya re? Tere ko maloom nahi yeh apun ka area hai?
Mujrim : Haan maloom hai na bhai.
Chaman : Phir kaise himmat ki rape karne ki apun ke area mein?
Mujrim : Ab kya boloon bhai, kismat kharab thi.
Chaman : Chal mere ko sub kuchh sach sach bata kya aur kaise hua?
Mujrim : Abhi kya na... idhar naake pe apun paan khane ke liye aaya...
Chaman : Phir?
Murjim : Apun khade hoke paan kharela tha... aur utne mein samne wali building pe apun ki nazar gayi...
Chaman : Aage bol
Mujrim : Udhar teesre maale pe ek chikni khadi hui thi
Chaman : Phir kya hua?
Mujrim : Apun ko aisa laga ke usne ishaara kiya aane ke liye..
Chaman : Phir tune kya kiya?
Mujrim : Apun socha ke kuchh kaam hoyenga usko.... to apun builidng ke neeche gaya
Chaman : Phir?
Mujrim : Usne Ishare se apun ko upar bulaaya... apun seedi chadte yehich sochrela tha "Chaman Bhai ka area hai..... Lafda nahi karne ka"
Chaman : Chal fatafat aage bol
Mujrim : Apun ne usko jaake bola.... kya kaam hai.. kaiko ishara kiya apun ko?
Chaman : Phir?
Mujrim : Phir kya bhai, apun ko usne ghar ke andar kheech liya
Chaman : (Excited) Phir?
Mujrim : Apun ghar me to chala gaya lekin soch raha tha ki "Chaman Bhai ka area hai..... Lafda nahi karne ka"
Chaman : Aage bol
Mujrim : Usne apun ka haath pakad liya
Chaman : Achcha... Phir?
Mujrim : Sachchi bolta hai bhai haath pakadte hi apun phir socha "Chaman Bhai ka area hai..... Lafda nahi karne ka"
Chaman : Phir kya hua?
Mujrim : Phir kya tha... Usne bola chikne meri pyaas bujha de
Chaman : Phir tu kya bola (Getting Excited)?
Mujrim : Apun kya bolta, usne apna duppata neechey gira diya
Chaman : To phir kya hua?
Mujrim : Apun ke dimag ki dahi ho gaya, kya mamme (boobs) the saali ke...lekin bhai phir bhi apun socha "Chaman Bhai ka area hai..... Lafda nahi karne ka"
Chaman : Phir tune kya kiya?
Mujrim : Apun bola ek-do kiss karega aur chala jayega..... zyada boli to body kaam karenga lekin engine nahi kholney ka.... Aakhir, "Chaman Bhai ka area hai..... Lafda nahi karne ka"
Chaman : To phir?
Mujrim : Usne apun ko kheech liya.... sacchi bolta hai bhai aisi katil jawaani apun akkhi life me nahi dekha.
Chaman : Haan, woh to hai.... Tu aage bol (Starts to heat up)
Mujrim : Phir kya tha.... apun ne kiss kiya, mamme (boobs) bhi dabaya.... lekin imaan se bolta hai, soch raha tha "Chaman Bhai ka area hai..... Lafda nahi karne ka"
Chaman : Aage bol?
Mujrim : Phir usne apni kameez utar di
Chaman : Phir?
Mujrim : Phir salwar, lekin apun ke dil me ekich khayal aa raha tha "Chaman Bhai ka area hai..... Lafda nahi karne ka"
Chaman : Aage aage?
Mujrim : Phir blouse aur chaddi saali ne sab utar di
Chaman : Sahi mein?
Mujrim : Phir meri pant kheech li.
Chaman : Achcha?
Mujrim : Meri underwear mein haath dal diya.
Chaman : Oh !!
Mujrim : Chaddi utar di meri, lekin apun phir bhi socha "Chaman Bhai k! a area hai..... Lafda nahi karne ka"
Chaman : (Getting frustrated).
Mujrim : Phir woh haath phiraane lagi.
Chaman : (Half Boiling)
Mujrim : Phir mooh ghumaane lagi..... phir bhi apun yehi soch raha tha "Chaman Bhai ka area hai..... Lafda nahi karne ka"
Chaman: (About to blast) Aage... aage bol sale....
Mujrim: Chumney Chatney lagi bhaaaaiiii.....lekin bhai kasam se......main yehi soch raha tha "Chaman Bhai ka area hai..... Lafda nahi karne ka"
Chaman: Abbe teri to.... Chaman Bhai Gaya Maa Chudaney..... tu aage bol!
Mujrim : Yehich...... yehich - apun ne bhi yehi socha bhai.....aur game baja dala.!!!

Q: Whats Shiney Ahuja's fav song?
A: Maid in India!

Q: What kind of disorder does Shiney have ?
A: Bai-polar disorder

Q: What is Shiney Ahuja's fav mode of transportation?
A: Bai-cycle

Q: What kind of food does shiney like?
A: Home Maid !

Q: Who is Shiney's fav football player ?
A: Bai Chung Bhutia

Q: What is Shiney Ahuja's fav subject?
A: Bai-ology

Q: In cricket, what way does Shiney get most of his runs from?
A: Leg-Bai-es.

Q: Which Song did Shiney sing with N'Sync
A: Bai Bai Bai !

Q: What is Shiney's fav Enrique Iglesias song?
A: Bai-lamos

Shiney Ahuja took the 'Where in Mumbai should you live' Facebook quiz, it said he should live in the suburb of Bai-culla.
Q: Why was Shiney Ahuja picked by the Ministry of External Affairs for a official foreign trip?
A: Because he is bai-lingual.

Q: What did Shiney Ahuja say to the police?
A: Let the bai-gones be bai-gones. Let me go home

Q: Why did Shiney Ahuja rush into the doctors dispensary?
A: Because the doctors sign-board said Bai-pass surgeon.

Q: Why was Shiney Ahuja shooed away by the guards outside a public event?
A: Because it said Bai-standers not allowed.

Q: Why did Shiney Ahuja hop on Virar-express train ?
A: Because it stops at Bai-andar station.

Q: Why did Shiney Ahuja want to be in the governing body of an organization?
A: Because he wanted to pass a new bai-law

Q: Why does shiney Ahuja like horror movies ?
A: Because he can see Bai-yanak scenes

Q: What type of code did Shiney Ahuja write when he was a programmer?
A: Bai-nari code

Q: Why does Shiney Ahuja like the Chinese?
A: Because he heard the slogan 'Hindi-Cheeni bai-bai'

Class mein shor ho raha tha teacher nahi tha,
Principal entered in class an asked angrily:
Kis ka period chal raha hai?
4 larkian sharmatay hue: Sir Hamara